Thursday, August 28

Gatau

I dont know how time could change someone to be unknown. So long since the last time i talked to him. Everything was so fine until that time took his warm side. He's no longer kind and see me as his friend. I don't know, it's like i did something that made him mad, but i really don't know what i'd done. People said that time heals everything but, many years have passed and it still hurts me.

Kehilangan bisa sesakit ini.
Eventho we're ONE cm away but it feels like you're in another space. Jauh dan tidak terkejar. Sedih? Iya. Sedih banget but who am i? 

Sorry not sorry

Monday, August 25

2014's shit.

2014 teaches me how to believe in destiny that god has created. He gives me what i need, not what i want. Today, i'm a more-grateful-human, learning to accept this kind of thing. Tidak mudah untuk saya, menerima semuanya, but I have to understand, inilah saatnya saya untuk belajar ikhlas.
Jadi, inikah yang disebut orang sebagai takdir? Hahaha. Menyingkirkan rasa 'ingin' yang sudah lama menggumpal, demi menghadapi apa yang seharusnya saya terima.
Ikhlas. I'm still learning.

Saturday, August 9

at least, we're still staring at the same sky and the same moon.
that makes me feel like we're so close.
meski jarang yang terbentang between us isn't that far
i can't see you.

Wednesday, August 6

call me 'manusia paling tidak bisa bersyukur' today.
honestly, i feel like saya masih gelo dan sedih karena belum bisa mencapai target fakultas tahun ini. i'm sad. bukan gelo karena tidak bisa mencapainya, namun lebih ke gelo karena ibu saya. alasan klise, bilang saja karena kamu memang sedih karena dirimu sendiri. ya itu salah juga salah satunya. kalau orang lain bisa, kenapa saya tidak bisa menembus pilihan pertama tahun ini?
masih gelo sampai terbawa mimpi.
dan saya merasa, kenapa saya tidak bisa dengan mudah ikhlas, rela dan memulai mimpi yang baru lagi?
sempat merasa, apakah saya terlalu ambisius?
is this the best, or Tuhan pun masih ingin menguji ketangguhan saya tahun depan?
i don't know. i just don't know…